Friday, January 18, 2013

I Cannot

I just cannot write for what I do not believe in
I cannot be given assignments paraphrased
Cos no one else wants them

I just cannot keep quiet and see all the corruption
I cannot sit back when I have a mouth to speak
And a hand to write

I just cannot handle the cultural shock I'm facing
Being "sheltered" all my life
Isn't really all that helpful

I just cannot pen down words that are not in my soul
I love justice
Not cos it's cool but cos it is right

I just cannot go on demonstrations
If I do not understand the cause
Was it really for mankind or more for "humane-kind"

I just cannot bring myself to do things
Even if it gives a salary
It's the passion that will make me keep my job

I just cannot stand it when everyone speaks in euphemisms
Trying to guess what's happening or already have been happening
Its really hard for a 21 year old

I don't want to be conned into doing assignments I do not agree to
But its the experience that counts
And if I don't see it now, I'll never fight for change

I did not understand the phrase
"Evil triumphs when righteous men do nothing" as a college freshie
Three years later into the working world, I finally understood

I cannot sit back and relax
Complaining and blaming
Without doing anything

And as I'm pacing around in this office cos I'm alone here writing a "not-heeded" story, I choose to believe that God is righteous, faithful and ever-loving. I go over to my boss' desk and see a wooden plaque by his board. It meant Peaceful with the the verse Micah 6:9 at the bottom. I bent forward to take a closer look:

"And what does the Lord require of you
But to do justice, to love mercy
And to walk humbly with your God."
I can see the difficulty faced
But I just cannot.

*I love my bosses, they're really kind and friendly, taking real care of me, fifth day as an intern and I'm seeing so much already. Can't believe there's so many righteous people in my country, but I still question the ones on top. It just boggles my "naive" mind.

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