This time last year

This time last year
I wasn't myself
walked around with head stooped down
thinking crazy thoughts that polluted my mind

This time last year
never said a word
but the words that did come out
were really weird ones
so weak that i couldn't control myself
not even the words that came out from my mouth
for the words spoken i felt
came from a different source

This time last year
I was so not myself
afraid of every single little thing
from the sound of the tv
to the songs from the radio
dialogues and lyrics were twisted in my mind
making me think that its me against the world

This time last year
I was hurting myself
but most importantly I was hurting the ones I love
I didnt know it that time
for I wasn't even myself
but when I see the aftermath
then is when i realize
I have made the closest people to me
worried and scared of how I was behaving

This time last year
I didn't even feel alive
like literally
my presence, my body was on earth
but somehow my mind took me too a far away place
I'm not quite sure where
But i'm sure i don't wanna go back there

Here and now
I'm feeling so good
chatting with a close friend
just being my typical talkative self
But it is seriously by the grace of God
that I'm even writing this
right here and right now
for what i am going to reveal in the entries to come
may be really shocking to some....