Tuesday, June 10, 2014

3 times the repeat...

Three times the repeat
That's what jolted me up from my evening nap
It wasn't one time not just that
But twice before even during my usual sleeps

It has different contents but holds the same meanings
Something initially beautiful and wonderful
Rushed, disorganized and oh so frightening
Like waking up to cry is my only escape

Were those warning signs not yet acted upon
Did it have to repeat itself three times
For me to truly understand
And make a decisive decision to act upon it?

Sometimes things are thrown at you
Beyond what you can handle
And right here right now
I'd realized this is the part where I let it go

Life has this way of chasing you
Dreams even
As if we're not already tired by the days duties already
Needing to accommodate to this weird images during rest time

"Don't worry, don't worry, I got you"
"Trust little child, it's gonna be alright"
I hear my favorite singer from Bethel sing spontaneously
"All things work together for the good of those who love the Lord"

And although the fear did not magically disappear
I know I can lean on Him in every situation
I can converse with Him on what to do next
On my responds, my fears and the risks needed to be taken

It took three times the repeat to catch my attention
But I'm here now not fully ready yet to face the music
But well aware that I'm not alone in this
Just curiously wondering what the other end might perceive of it

This is scary
Like how my future depends on it
The life's of my children's children
Yet I will behold it with grace, faith and courage

Allowing love to knit them together
By the third you know they're not just any accident
Signs you cannot just let pass by
I shall and will read these signs correctly

I took it lightly initially
But now I'm fully aware of the matter at hand
I shall look into this and not linger anymore
Because it took three times the repeat

To really get hold of me....

Monday, June 2, 2014

The Start and the End

When I wake up in the morning
A sleepy smile on my face
I whisper "Good Morning" to You

Waken up, vulnerable yet not afraid
Messy hair, eye bags and all
I know You still see me as beautiful and perfect

I say a little prayer
May You be prevalent in my days circumstance
Every word I say and move I make

The lovely and not so lovely people I meet
The context in which each situation brings
The not so "accidental coincidences"

May words spoken and actions taken
Lead to Your Glory
For Your name only

And as I go through my day
May you be constant in my thoughts
Day dreaming about You is what I long for

Questioning You about things I don't understand
Acknowledging You in every decision I make
Making sure that all that I do puts a smile on Your face

That, is true worship
Not just singing some song at some particular time
But offering my whole life as a worship to You

Come home looking forward to that time again
Alone time with You
Something I was made for

Whether it's playing my guitar
Or soaking with songs from YouTube
You're not picky on which way I choose

I ravish in Your love for me
As I sing to You
And You over me

That bond between us unlike any other
More than the love of a mother
It's a covenant of gold

And when I'm all tired and groggy
Ready to wind down for the day
And on my bed lay

I say another prayer
Thanking You for the day
How good You've been to me

Reflecting on the conversations
Situations and circumstances
I know You're there through and through

And as I drift away
I dream of You and me
And the fun that will be

For when I wake up in the morning
Once again
There You'll be

And the beautiful cycle starts all over again
With You permeating every part of me
It's really a great relief

That You're forever present
Right here, right now
Right through eternity

Thank You, God for who You are
And who You've made me to be
Your Daughter and lover

In You there is no worry
For with me You'll forever be
Right from the start to the very end....

Sunday, June 1, 2014

Unassuming Reminders

Just went over to a friend's room
It's my eleventh day here in Liverpool
And although its loads of fun
My neck and shoulders hurt
From a pillow that's not hard enough

She gave me an awesome massage
Something I truly love and always look forward to
We discussed on our weeks reading assignments
And because I brought my guitar
We worshiped.

It doesn't matter whether you're in Malaysia or Liverpool
God's presence is everywhere
So close to you
Just the first few strums on the strings
And you know the true reason "why you're here on earth"

Came back to my room trying my best
To minimize on the procrastination
And get to my readings
Turned on my laptop
Turned on some music

In between readings
I check Facebook to see updates in our class group
Accidentally my eyes move over
To the bottom left corner of my homepage
And photos of 2013 come in sight

How did I get there?
I did not click on anything
A picture of me co-leading worship
Catches my eye
Memories come back and I sigh

That picture taken by a dear friend
Aptly captioned
"We never know how to worship until we know how to love"
Brings me back to my friend's room
Where we sang out heart's out to our Greatest Lover

Then I scroll back a few pictures
A personal feature I wrote in a newspaper during my internship
With a headline given by my editor
"Don't stop dreaming and believing in yourself"
Wow. I stand dumbfounded and amazed.
(I seriously wrote that? And my editor did that?)

I guess God works in the most mysteriously impossible ways
The measure of His love driving Him to an unimaginable level
Where He takes me on this breathless journey
On this road we call LIFE
Life given by True Life

Life has brought me here to Liverpool
A beautiful "picture-perfect" country
Trust me
My Instagram naturally looks better already
The way this city stands is wondrous

Yet aside from the beautiful people
Wonderful architecture and ancient heritage buildings
They still scream out 
What a Wonderful Maker
Reminding me of the goodness of my Creator

Oh ya, when writing the first line of this post
I looked at my computers clock
And it showed 1:11
The three numbers that God never fails to show me
Reminding me of His presence and promises

All these are but unassuming reminders
That God drops here and there
An exciting yet incredibly unconventional way of treasure hunt
Which time limit goes on forever
Just like a child, I'll enjoy this playtime

I'll go back to my readings
He makes life oh so exciting
The reason I live and breathe
Becomes even more heartfelt
Due to these wonderful

Unassuming Reminders...

"You never know how to worship until you know how to love."
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